Wednesday, March 11, 2015
Open Letter to The Girl
Dear Girl Who Broke My Son's Heart: He is in 7th grade. SEVENTH grade!! I explained to him last night that this is one of the many reasons why having a "girlfriend" is not necessary in the seventh grade. This is not something that seventh graders should have to deal with. However, he is dealing with it. The best part is that you are also a seventh grader. I was once a seventh grade girl and I'm pretty sure I was just like you. My apologies go out to everyone I knew between the 6th and 12th grades. Really, I am so sorry! Back to you - my son was pretty smitten by you. He even bought you a birthday gift for your birthday which happens to be today. However, in awesome seventh-grader fashion, you sent your friends to "break up" with him yesterday after the wrestling meet at your junior high school. Yeah, seventh graders rock! Oh, but wait - it gets better. Last night while we were eating dinner as a family, you sent one of those said friends to our house to knock on the door and tell him that you wanted him to call you. FYI, we have a landline. It's like an old-fashioned in-home, attached to walls phone. You can call there, well you could call there before this happened. Calling now probably wouldn't be a good idea. Why? Because if I answer, you and I are going to have a chat about seventh grade boundaries and etiquette. In fact, I will put Braxton on ANOTHER in-home, attached to the wall phone (yes, we have more than one. We are ancient!), and he will participate in this conversation with you and I because all seventh graders need to hear that this is just unnecessary. I'm relatively certain you should be worrying about braces, how to apply eye shadow in the most minimal amounts possible, and figuring out which Disney movie is your favorite. It is completely unnecessary for seventh graders to be in relationships. Period. I am throwing in a picture of Braxton because he's pretty dang cute, and because his mama bear is in the picture with him, which is appropriate, considering what we are dealing with here.