My Family

"Life will knock you down. You can choose to stand up again."

Wednesday, May 18, 2016

Right Now & Words

Right now is my happily ever after. It really is. I am learning and growing and falling and then getting back up. Isn't that what we all do everyday? Fall and then get back up. When we fall, we normally scrape our knee or our hands. They are sore and we have to clean them and sometimes put medicine on them. Then, we sort of ignore them as they heal. It might take a few days, but it heals. That's the same as our spirits and our souls. They get scraped up and sometimes bleed. They might even get infected. But, we take care of them and then they heal.

I went to dinner with a friend last night. It was a great hour, or so. We laughed a lot. I realized in that moment that my heart continues to heal. There are still days (obviously) where it gets scraped up BIG TIME. But, I take care of it and it heals.

Another thing, and this might offend some people. Sorry in advance. We all use words and rarely think about them and their meaning to others around us. I have done it my whole life, not giving much thought to it. But, to some they are hurtful and offensive and we need to be careful with what we say. Obviously, the word "retarded" is super offensive to me. Colton has been called that time and time again. It is infuriating to me when I hear it. People use it so freely, as if it's a comedy. It's not.

Last night I heard, "That's called stage 4 stupid." I laughed for a minute because I had never heard that term and I thought it was hilarious. Then, I stopped and wondered who might have heard it and if cancer is a real thing to them right now and if that just broke their hearts to hear it. Then it wasn't funny anymore.

I also hear a lot of people use the term "single mom" really loosely. If their spouse works long hours, they say that they are a "single mom." If their spouse is on vacation or is traveling for work, they use the term "single mom." This is pretty rough for me to hear right now. If your spouse is working long hours in order to support the family, you are not a single parent. If your spouse comes home to you and your family, you are not a single parent. If your spouse attends school events for your children ever, or helps to fix things around the house, or fix meals, or shop, or pay the bills, or comfort children, or talks to you about couple-things - you are not a single parent. Single moms, like me, do it all. We work to pay the bills, we raise our children alone, attend to meetings, appointments, school events, homework, doctor appointments, church events, stay up late with sick kids, stay up late with sad kids, comfort, soothe, fix, clean, cook, shop, take care of all yard work, do laundry, provide the spiritual support, teach, train, direct, and try to find time to sleep somewhere in between working multiple jobs just to make sure the children have hot water, electricity, pillows, blankets, food, shoes, socks, underwear, school supplies, insurance, hair cuts, and medication. That is what a single mom does.

So, I have learned that I need to be super careful with the words that I speak everyday because I have no idea if they will be hurtful or offensive to those around me. I'm grateful I've learned this lesson and SO hope that I do better. :)

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