Thursday, I had a bit of attitude. Strange, I know. I finally walked over to my boss's office and plopped down on my chair. I informed him that I was only in their for counseling. (He's totally used to this, by the way!) I told him I was angry. I was angry that I was paying for the divorce. I was angry that there is not going to be any discipline given by the Church. I was angry that life was just going to go on for him, while my children and I continue to try to recover from the last six years. He stopped me and said that he was sending me this article.
Then he said, "Heidi, why do you think he wants you back?" I answered that it was probably so that I could just continue to take care of everything. He said, "He wants what you have. Your boys are never, ever going to love him again. But they will always love their mama. So, when you feel like you don't want to go to the grocery store, or the park, or the post office, or the high school football game, or McDonalds because you're afraid he'll be there - you just remember that you'll always have the love of your boys. He'll never again have what you have." Somehow, that made me feel all better. Well, that combined with the article he sent me.
So, I put my big girl pants on and went on with my day. The anger went away. The bitterness went away. The frustration went away. And, I trekked on.