Wonder Woman

Kaydon had shots on Friday.

Three of them.

He asked for the superheroes bandaids.

And that is what he got.

He also asked me to wait to take pictures until he was flexing.

Done.

Kaydon has pretty bad skin issues.

He has extra, extra dry skin.

Like, his skin breaks apart and bleeds.

He also has the most severe acne of all of my children.

We went and visited with our Dr. Brough, who is the best family doctor for our family!

Kaydon is now on a lot of medications to help.

They are all topical and hidden because they are really expensive!

Colton would want to "give them a try" if they were out in the open.

In other news, I printed off Kaydon's Eagle Scout project fliers yesterday.

He is ready to get this thing done!

He is collecting new and gently used toys for the new Layton Hospital pediatric patients.

He and his troop will then wrap them all and deliver them before Christmas.

Ten Years

Everyone is doing these ten year challenges.

Here is ours.

Look at us!

The boys are SO tall and so handsome and so fun and so smart!

They are still so funny and constantly into goodness.

I am just the luckiest!

And, We Have Power

Annnnd, the brain has turned back on.

We have power to the part of this brain that like to go bye-bye.

Rough few days!

Like, rough.

Yesterday morning, I woke up and realized quickly that I had no idea where I was. 

My world was spinning.

I was crying.

I was hurting.

I was sad.

I was frustrated.

I was confused.

I was scared.

I was depressed.

I eventually got up and showered.

Which is no easy task when my brain is not working right.

Then I took myself to the gym and walked at the slowest possible pace, whilst holding on to the machine.

I felt my legs working.

I had ear plugs in so I couldn't hear anything around me.

I stared at the front of the machine so I wouldn't be over-stimulated by the sights all around me.

Then I went home and laid back down.

This morning, I woke up early and laid in my bed whilst praying.

I was asking for very specific things in my prayer.

I was immediately impressed upon to open to the General Conference talks from October (just last month).

May I take just a moment to say how blessed we are to just open those right up on our phone anywhere, anytime...

I read the article, "Spiritual Capacity."

It talks about the importance of seeking, receiving, and acting upon personal revelation.

It was written specifically for me in that moment.

And, I'm grateful.

So today, I try again.

I work.

I mother.

I work some more.

And I seek, receive and act upon personal revelation.

The Little Clues

This smile of mine.

I'm super proud of this smile of mine.

Most of the time, it's strong and wide.

It's genuine.

It's come from a lot of work.

It's come after a lot of tears, a lot of heartache.

That can be said for every single one of us.

When my brain starts to go haywire, my smile is a very apparent visual sign of it.

Most of the time, I feel like I hide it pretty well.

But, when I am in a slump like I am now (post-stroke wise), it gives us a pretty good indication that it's time for a reset.

You can see over the last two days that the left side of my smile is not as strong as the right side.

This will progressively get worse until I get my reset.

The tingling in my left fingers is evident today.

The twitching on the right side of my face is now at a constant.

My ability to remember simple things, like turning off the oven or stove, which exit to take to work, or setting my alarm is more and more real.

This episode began yesterday morning, but even with hours and hours of rest, it is not getting better.

Today I will go and get shots... lots of shots.

They will sort of shut my brain down and I will sleep A LOT for a long time.

It gives my brain a chance to reset.

When I wake up fully, almost always, the symptoms have gone away and I am okay for a while again.

In the meantime, I go to dream land for as long as my body needs me to.

And, I choose gratitude rather than sadness and anger and fear.

'Cause that's how we roll!

The Babes

Saturday, the babes came and had lunch with Auntie and Cousins.

Anson LOVES Gus.

Gus LOVES Asher.

Asher HATES Gus.

Gus HATES Anson.

And, it's hilarious.

At one point, Anson laid on the kitchen table on his tummy...

He hung his head off the side, trying to get Gus's attention.

While doing that, Gus was trying to play with Asher.

Asher was running away from Gus.

These babies have my heart!

They will always be babies to Auntie.

I could just love on them and mug their little faces for days!

I am always SO impressed with their mommy.

She is patient, calm, relaxed and SUCH a boy mama!

They are so active and busy.

She encourages them and loves them and protects them.

She introduces them to the world on a daily basis.

She is nurturing and fun.

Being an auntie is a dream!

All The Single Ladies & Blessings

How awesome-sauce are these two quotes??

I'll answer that:

They are completely, freaking awesome!

For the first time in my entire earthly existence, I am SO single and SO good with it!

I am so, unbelievably busy.

That can be good.

I barely have time to do my own laundry...

It's currently still sitting in the washing machine going on the 18th hour of being in there.

I'll have to wash it again before I dry it!

My sink is full of dirty dishes.

My carpet needs to be cleaned.

My bedding needs to be washed.

Halloween needs to be put away, away.

Things need to be organized.

But, no time.

Do you know what else I don't have time for?
A relationship.

With anyone by my Heavenly Father, myself and my children.

And, I am so good with that!

SO good.

It feels SO amazingly freeing and empowering to be SO good with that!

In other news...

The blessings in our lives have been immense and unmistakable.

I know that I am doing everything in my mortal power to pay our bills.

Everything.

Every day/night before I dash, we pray.

And our prayers are very specific.

VERY.

And after every delivery, we thank God for the blessings.

He is making up the difference for us.

It is obvious and can't be argued with.

It is not coincidence or luck.

It is answers to our constant prayers.

And, we are grateful.

Chile

Tensions in the country where my oldest child is continue to be high.

I am grateful for the nightly updates from the Mission Office.

I had thought that things were much better, much more quiet.

When I spoke to my Bubba on Monday, he said that they are back to working and walking and riding busses.

However, it appears that things really aren't the peaceful, dream-like state that I had hoped.

Although, it's important to remember that for the most part, Jackson is not in a dangerous area.

Most of the protests that are going on inland of where he is currently living take place in the nighttime hours, and are blocks removed from him.

He has told me in the last few weeks that at no point has he felt that he was in harm's way.

Our family's prayers go out to those missionaries who are in harm's way.

May God provide comfort and safety for them, and for their families.

The update from last night:

Dear parents of Chile Viña del Mar missionaries:

 

I wish I could write to you this time to tell you that the protests and demonstrations have definitely ended in Chile, but the reality is that it is not so, however this does not represent any direct risk for the missionaries. During this time we have been setting an information network between the members and the missionaries at the local level and between the Area Seventy, the stake presidents and me at the level of the entire mission. In this way we are notified in advance of the protests that are announced in each city and we can notify the missionaries to avoid those areas. The instruction we are giving to the missionaries is that their security is the first priority, that despite we have goals for proselyting hours and contacting people, those goals go to second place when it comes to their safety, and that in case of any indication of problems they should return to their apartments. Taking these precautions we have avoided any problem and we have not had any incident involving missionaries. We have already been notified that there will be some large demonstrations tomorrow and we have informed the missionaries to avoid the areas that will be affected.

 

The missionaries are fantastic and work with great love and devotion, we know that the Lord protects them, but we are also telling them that we are the first responsible to guarantee our safety and then the Lord will protect us better. We love missionaries and their safety is our top priority at this time. The Area Presidency is aware of the situation and is daily interested in the conditions of the missionaries.

 

Today we have made the changes of companionships and all the missionaries traveled very well to their new assigned sectors and were received by their new companions.

 

I will be reporting again to you tomorrow.

Mi Familia Update

This mama has a goal!

Take MORE pictures!!!

Update:

Jackson:

Elder Jorgensen is back in the groove! 

He is working and working hard.

He and his new companion are a great team.

Jacks says that they get along SO good!

We sent him his package yesterday!

He can't wait to get his JIF peanut butter!

I absolutely love seeing his face and hearing his voice every Monday.

The change in that rule that came earlier this year was seriously the greatest blessing for this mama!

He has been out for 11 months!

Braxton is working hard and doing really well in school.

He worked a 13-hour shift on Monday.

He is learning so much at his new job.

Peanut got a speeding ticket about a month ago - on his way to see his mama.

It was a $270 ticket!

I was so proud of him because he went to the court and set up a payment plan.

He did not ask to have the ticket lowered.

I asked him why!!

He said, "I was going 82. I didn't use my blinker to switch lanes. That's what I owe."

Integrity, Son. Integrity.

Kaydon now has two jobs.

He is still at Cold Stone, and also got a job at Hollister.

Kaydon has always been the brother who has spent the most time with Colton.

But, that really is at an all-time high.

They have lunch together every day.

They have planned activities that they do all the time together.

It's super cool to watch.

They read scriptures together every morning.

I just love listening!

I am loving our relationship right now.

There is nothing like hearing Buddha say, "I am unbelievably proud of my mom."

Colton is my absolutely favorite dashing partner!

That kid makes me laugh like no one else on this planet.

He is the funniest.

He is a hard worker with Mommy.

He never complains about our long weekend shifts, either!

I really do need to look into him getting a job that he can get a pay check from.

I pay him to clean the complex, but he really wants to work like Brothers work.

He is doing really well in school this year.

I am, as always, grateful to teachers and administrators who support those with different abilities.

This mama is crazy-busy.

I work my full-time job.

Then, I dash almost full-time.

I am extremely involved with Green Horizen, as a member of the leadership team.

I am still selling Younique - going live almost every day.

We also still clean the complex.

I am also now a Primary teacher - so planning lessons again is super cool.

I am really trying to schedule a day every few weeks with Carrie that the boys and I can go over after work to do an activity with the babes. It's just my favorite.

I continue to develop new or worsening symptoms.

These are just part of my new normal.

My brain gets tired much easier.

It is much more fragile.

Although these new or worsening symptoms are frustrating, and sometimes I have a good cry - I am grateful for what I AM able to do!

I found this image and I love it!

I love that I can send this to my kids and ask them what color they are at or look at it and see what color I am at, and then adjust our lives accordingly, until we can get back to a safe color!

The boys and I discussed at Family Council what we should do for Thanksgiving - stay home or go to Papa's.

The boys are very set on having our own.

I think that's amazing!

So, Mama will be cooking up a storm for Thanksgiving and we will do our own traditions!

Which will include decorating for the holidays, of course!!!

Missionary Moment - Chile Vina Del Mar Mission

Buenos días! Es un gusto que tengo para hablar con todos ustedes hoy!

These past couple of weeks have been really awesome actually! Some super crazy stuff and a lot of work and in the end we ended with some awesome results! So I don't remember much of what happened 2 weeks ago but this week was pretty nuts.

Well, on monday we had a good time. I was in the middle of teaching our zone and it just so happened that it was time for a small earthquake so that was awesome. I don't know how big it was, they say it was like a 6 here in Chile but the states say it was like 7 something. It was awesome seeing a couple of elders jumping up and running out of the room while the rest of us just kind of sat there and tried to clean all the dust up and sit it out. We were in the chapel so nothing was going to happen, just kind of a fun experience!

The next experience is we had a baptism of a young man we have been teaching! Martin is his name (I'll drop a pic for you guys) and he was really kind of hard to teach because he is only really here once a week so we ended up teaching in a different way than usual but in the end he said he wanted to get baptised on Saturday and that is what happened! He was super excited and he said he felt a light that he has never felt before in his life when he came out of the water! It was so awesome to see the huge smile on his face and the support of the parents that aren't members!

We also pranked our old zone leader who is on his way home from completing his 2 years. It was a rough week for that poor guy. At least 1 prank every day! We took out the pallets on his bed, put his laundry in an empty toilet, tied all of his things into one giant knot, baby powder attacks, silly spray attacks, and we ate all his eggs. The last one you would think is really stupid but that man loves his eggs. It was a great week for us!

But that is about it for us! Love you all tons and I'll talk to you all soon!

Elder Jorgensen

My Tribe

You can't see this necklace up close.

But, it's my new favorite.

It reads, "Raising my Tribe."

True that.

I've always felt like I was raising my tribe.

But, now I REALLY feel like I'm raising my tribe.

I've never been a bad mom.

I've made bad choices.

But, I've always loved my children with everything that is me.

I didn't have the developmental skills to do better than I did.

Now I do.

I have the tools.

I'm learning and growing.

And, I'm doing it every day.

This morning, Kaydon and Colton came into my room to do scripture study.

I was trying to get ready while they were reading.

Then, Kaydon showed us two videos and talked about his feelings about these videos.

One was about Nephi building a new bow and arrow.

The other was about the good samaritan.

Both videos tell me this:

Heavenly Father is never not there.

He always provides us a way.

He never gives up on us.

Ever.

We all need to be that good samaritan.

Not judge.

Not be held back by what others in our "tribe" tell us to or not to do when it comes to helping others.

Not wait around for praise or thanks.

Do the right thing because it's the right thing.

Always.

AND we ALL murmur.

Lehi murmured!

Sariah murmured!

Yet, they knew Who to go to always.

And, God was there.

Always.

That didn't mean that he just dropped a bow and arrow from the sky and placed 15 animals right in front of them to kill for food.

No.

They had to figure it out.

They had to work.

Hard.

They had to overcome obstacles - such as their own family members wanting to kill them and TRYING to kill them.

And, Nephi.

That Nephi is a good dude.

For real for real.

He kept going.

He kept trying.

He always had faith in his father and his Father.

I am so grateful to be raising my tribe.

To be present.

To have the ability to work four jobs.

To have food on our table.

To be able to be surrounded by my babies.

To have the Spirit in our home.

To go from murmuring (fighting with one another) to loving one another to the max.

I love this tribe of mine.

Moving On

I got a text this morning.

She's moving.

Out of state.

Far away.

She will no longer be able to see me.

I will no longer be able to see her. 

Katryna.

My therapist.

My sofa queen.

My person.

And now, she is moving on.

To a different state.

Oh, the feelings and emotions.

Sadness.

Fear.

Anxiety.

So, I texted T.

Of course I texted T.

What else am I going to do?!

This is what I KNOW:
God is so aware of me.

Completely aware of me.

This is part of my journey.

For Katryna to have given me all the tools I need, and then for her to move on so that I can move forward as well.

God is aware of what I need, and who I will need.

And, I already have a neurology team, with a counselor who I will now see.

I KNOW that I have my past history understood.

I KNOW that I have the tools that I need.

I KNOW that I have set boundaries that are necessary.

I KNOW that I have feelings, that they are okay, and that I can manage them.

I KNOW that I will miss her beyond words.

I KNOW that she is exactly who God knew I needed to start the recovery process - recovery from my entire life.

And now I am here.

And ready to move forward.

Packages

I work with family.

Not the kind that I was born into, or that I birthed.

But, family none the less.

Kalynn is always right on top of getting package goods ready for Jackson.

When he called me a couple of weeks ago, he said, "Ma. Can I please talk to Grandma Kay?"

So, I took my phone out to her and they talked away.

He told her what he wanted in his "Christmas" package.

He talked about how he wants it to feel like Christmas.

She wrote it all down.

Then, yesterday she came in with all the goods.

Xavier added the variety pack of beef jerky to it this morning - Jackson's favorite.

I will get a box today and find his stocking... or a stocking to send with it.

And for all of you missionary parents who have kiddos IN the United States...

I envy you and the cost of shipping!!

Talk With P

I haven't been to talk to P since before the stroke...

Probably a full two years ago.

I've driven on the main street just a block away from his resting spot countless times, but never stopped.

Saturday, I finished my eight hour shift.

I ended up near his resting spot and had an overwhelming feeling - like my heart was going to pop out of my chest feeling - that I needed to stop.

Finding his actual resting spot is pretty easy.

P hated pine trees.

With a passion.

Like, he wanted every City pine tree banned.

He is buried right under THE pine tree in the cemetery and it makes me chuckle.

Find THE pine tree, and you have found P!

I parked and walked the 20 yards up to the tree.

It was decorated with wind chimes and hats.

Lots of hats from different vendors who we worked with over the years.

Butterflies.

And spooky Halloween decorations.

It was the first time I have seen the headstone.

It took my breath away.

As I sat and talked to him, I looked right at his mustached face.

It's November, and he would be growing his disgusting mustache as we speak.

I told him that I was sorry I haven't been for a while.

I asked him why I felt so compelled to stop on that day.

I told him that I'm trying really hard and that I am sorry if I've disappointed him.

I talked to him about my Jackson and his Jaxon (who is also on a mission).

I told him about the other kids, people at work and that his view is still so amazing.

I told him that I miss him.

I asked him what he and Sarah do all day.

I asked him if he and Lane were growing their November staches.

I told him I loved him.

Then, I left.

Halloween

My sister sent me these pictures of the boys!

The cutest little skeleton's ever!!

Like, EVER.

In the history of EVER!

Pretty sure Anson was not having the whole beanie thing, though.

We had one trick-or-treater at the office.

You guys, I'm a sucker for babies.

Sucker!

This little love made my day!

I gave her every piece of sugar that we possibly had in the building, then I followed her around asking if I could borrow her Jordans.

She said, "NO!"