An Unexpectedly Beautiful Weekend

Thursday, Josh texted me and told me that Brooklyn was really wanting to see the boys and I. I told him that we would love to have her. He told me that he was working on Saturday 5:30 am - 2:20 pm. I suggested that she sleep at our house and stay with us Saturday until he got off of work. He then asked me if I would also like to have the baby. I was a little caught off guard. I obviously haven't even seen the baby yet. I told him I would talk to my boys and get back with him. I spoke to each of my boys, individually. Everyone was okay with it. So, late Friday evening Josh brought Brooklyn (who was absolutely ecstatic to see us) and the baby. The baby sat in his baby carrier for a little bit while I allowed all of my emotions to process. I just looked at him. He is a beautiful baby. I took him out, changed his diaper, put him in his pajamas, then I held him. I allowed myself to cry. I allowed myself to feel. I allowed myself to forgive. I allowed myself to love.

Brooklyn crawled into bed with me and the baby (his name is Treyvan, but I call him Goober) slept next to me in a bassinet. I was up most of the night. He is a loud sleeper. When Kaydon heard him fussing at 5:30, he came in to see if he could help. I made a bottle to feed him and Brooklyn asked Kaydon to crawl into bed with her, so he did. The baby and I went downstairs to feed him and then we fell asleep on the couch. As the children woke up, they each took their own personal time with him as well. Both Braxton and Kaydon fed him. Jackson spent time tickling his arms and talking to him. The three of them tried to figure out how to change a diaper (it was the funniest thing I have ever seen!). We played outside, put Legos together, ate popsicles, and watched Baby Einstein. It was an unexpectedly beautiful day.

When Josh came to pick them up, Brooklyn cried and cried. I pulled her aside and told her that I would always be her mama and the boys would always be her brothers. She nodded and cried somemore. She told her dad that this was his fault and that she was very mad at him. He acknowledged it and told her he was so sorry and that he knew he messed up very, very badly. Then, off they went.

Our family of five then celebrated Kaydon's 14th birthday. Oh, my boys crack me up! They are so dang funny.

Oh, how I love my children. Oh, how I am so thankful for forgiveness and joy. Oh, how I am so thankful for my Heavenly Father who is very patient, who has a plan for us, who knows best, who loves us so very, very much.