Friday, February 15, 2019

Keep Showing Up

I went to the gym Tuesday morning. 
As I do.
As I was finishing up my Yoga, I noticed commotion.
A sweet elderly man who is at the gym every morning had vomited and passed out.
He was conscious again, but he and every single surface around him was covered in vomit.
Never in my life have I seen so much vomit.
Ever.
My mama instincts kicked in and I went to the janitor's closet and got rags and water and a mop.
I desperately wanted to clean him up before the paramedics got there.
But they were fast.

I spent a bit of time helping to clean up the area with the gym employees, then I headed home to get ready for work quickly.
My morning was going as normal until about 11 am when my brain got very, very fuzzy and I became confused and dizzy.
Numbness started in my left hand and was moving up.
Ugh.

I would be unable to drive.
 Barely able to walk.
Kyle came and picked me up and got me in bed where I went to Dreamland for several hours.
When I awoke, I was still tired but the fuzz and dizziness had stayed in Dreamland.

I didn't go to the gym Wednesday or Thursday, which puts me off my routine.
Going to the gym is my time.
It's my time to be strong.
It's my time to reward my body for being so awesome-sauce.
It's my time to listen to whatever music I want to listen to and to work hard.
For me.
Not going puts me in a bit of a funk.

Then yesterday, I got an email from my attending physician at IMC.
It was completed FMLA paperwork for 2109.
I always struggle a bit to read the wording.
'Neurological Disorder' 
'Periods of extreme cognitive fatigue'
'Periods of dizziness, fuzziness, numbness, forgetfulness, inability to perform duties of any kind'

Those can sting a little.
But then I realize that I am SO BLESSED.
I have more good days than bad days.
I am working.
Yes, a few times a month I must leave work early to go home and just sleep.
But it's okay.

And today, I was back at the gym and feeling more like myself!


And, these two.
These were my Valentine's pictures.
These boys have my heart.
I remember holding them for the first time after I couldn't hold them for a while.
It was Heaven.
And everyday since then has been Heaven as well.



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