Single Mom Gig - It's All Me

Colton is at work with me this morning. He has his Autism check-up today. So, I dropped his brother off at school and Colton and I came to work. We will be here until it's time to head to his appointment. Then I will drop him off at school and come back to work. It's all me.

I sometimes wonder what it would be like to be a stay-at-home mom. What would it be like to go volunteer in their classrooms? What would it be like to take them to their appointments without worrying about how quickly I have to get back to work? What would it be like to be there when they get home from school? What would it be like to make an after-school snack? What would it be like to have them call me from school because they were sick and be able to just go get them... without having to figure out how I am going to do that because I am in the middle of a meeting. What would it be like to not rush home to fix a quick dinner so that I can have some mama time at the gym for 45 minutes? What would it be like to not have to worry about how we are going to afford groceries this week?

Then I take a step back in to my reality. I am so blessed. These boys are beyond amazing. They absolutely go with the flow. They never complain. If tuna casserole is what's for dinner, then that's what's for dinner. If Jackson has to check out of school to get a sick brother from school, he doesn't complain. He just helps his mama. If the house isn't clean... which it never is... we do our best to help each other clean it up.

Last night, a sweet friend came to the door. I was about to run away... for real! It was one of those nights. She laughed and told me that she thought I was amazing. I think SHE is amazing. Her mom passed away a couple of months ago. It has been so hard for her. She lived with her mom and cared for her. She has never married and does not have children. In that moment, I realized that I am doing just fine. As I think about our challenges... and everyone has challenges... I realize that I have been blessed with four boys. I have been blessed with the opportunity to care for them, to teach them, to train them, to direct them, and to LOVE them. I have been trusted with their spirits. I have been trusted to wipe their tears, and my own.

It's all me. But, really... we are doing just fine.